Tom, you are obviously in denial...
As a concerned friend, and internet buddy,  I would STRONGLY  recommend that you get a healthy dose of "Therapy" you can find within the confines of your abode. If you forgot where that is, it's VERY CLOSE to where you took that picture!! Addictions are not to be forgotten!! 
Please report back on your recovery progress!! 
__________________
Mike, a.k.a Eastern Roads
President, CEO, CFO, MOW Chief, Painter, Janitor Penn-Haven Central RR
Where Alcos, Fairbanks-Mrse, Baldwins, EMD's and the rare GE live on
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